My name is Troy

Oh for fuck's ... To be honest, I am mostly embarrassed by the sudden attention on RYWHM. Mortified might be a better word.

1. Set up a profile in the comments of this post.

eg: 'Hi, my name is: Elle-Mae. Attributes: N/S, GSOH. IMNSHO ImRdy4Luv and VDWPKOL
Not interested in: EDP, Liberal voting fucktards.
Looking for: TOBYtoby or equivalent.'

It is pretty fucking amusing. My online persona seems to get so much attention, far removed from me, you know, as an actual person.

I am waiting for someone to realise that a pretentious vocabulary and an excessively cunning use of commas does not negate the fact that I am a scruffy dork, with a scarcity of actual real world social skills. I was once picked at school on by the kids who played Dungeons & Dragons, inside a game of Dungeons & Dragons. The other kids 10th Level Fighter-Mage's would pick on my 2nd Level Paladin.

To further demonstrate:

I was once called Troy for several weeks in 1994. The only reason I stopped being called Troy is because I never spoke to those people ever again.

I had just started and Arts degree at Queensland Uni, majoring in Ancient History and Philosophy, if I recall correctly. I had just moved to Brisbane from Toowoomba and knew no-one other than my girlfriend and my nymphomaniac flatmate. After an 'Introduction to Philosophy' lecture I got talking to some guy, possibly because we both had Cure t-shirts. Everything was going swimmingly, until we met up with a group of his friends and he introduced me as Troy.

And this is where my complete spasticicity in large groups of people got me.

I froze.

And rather than do the sensible thing, which was to say 'My name is actually Toby, I play the drums and am slightly deaf and tend to mumble, sorry about that' (and nicely introducing the fact that I am a real-life rock musician and therefore actually quite 'cool'*), I shut up.

For the next several weeks I saw this guy in lectures and sat with his friends in the great court, all the while being called Troy.

Eventually, I couldn't take it anymore and I started avoiding them. By then it was too late to fix things ...

About a year later the same guy showed up at the share house were I resided in squalor with several other 'gentlemen' (Brisbane is quite small and everyone eventually knows everyone else) and I was introduced as 'Toby'. He had no idea what the fuck was going on. And I didn't say anything. Again.

But yes. I am totally on Dell's team on this one, so no profile for me. Meeting people is cool. Dating ... I'm not so sure about. I'm more from the 'get drunk and meet people instant chemistry school of love', myself.

I am going to set up my own club though - Dork Club. Or something, I need a name. We're going to play games. Boardgames, roleplaying games, computer games. Etc.


* I am aware that this makes me a wanker. But I'd rather be a slight wanker known as Toby than a complete dork incorrectly known as Troy.